Consistently throughout my teaching career, my message to my students has always been to study, study, and study some more. Every night, memorize a few more words, work a few more problems, take another practice exam. It will alleviate the panic.
One would think that I, as the student and incumbent to taking the GRE exam, would follow my own sage advice. After all, it comes from a program in which I have complete faith. I know it works; I have seen it work in the students' increased understanding of concepts about which only a few weeks earlier they were unclear, in the students' improved scores between practice tests one and two.
Practice ALWAYS makes perfect.
So why couldn't I follow my own advice? My own teachings?
Probably for the same excuse my students always give me: I don't have time.
Oh, but you do, which is what I always tell my students when they give me that excuse. All it takes is the desire to get it done and then work it into your schedule. Make it happen.
I had the desire to get it done but every time I sat down to do it, I came up with a handy excuse why I couldn't. Or some other more interesting activity presented itself at the same time as I had my study guide open: my computer beckoned me to check my email, update my status on Facebook, or write a new blog post.
I rationalized. I came up with some good ones, too.
1. "You don't need to learn new vocabulary words. With as much as you read, and all of the times you have taught that SAT class, you probably know any word that could come up on the GRE." WRONG! Words like abstruse and sedulous appeared instead of words like banal and prescient.
2. "Practice tests are a waste of time. I only need to know the strategies and method; this will keep me from spending too much time on the questions." WRONG! The computer-based test does not allow you to move to the next question until you answer the one you are on. So, unlike the paper test, you are not allowed to leave any answers blank. Consequently, I did alot of guessing even after taking too long to try to come up with the right answer.
3. "Math is boring; why would an English Literature student need to know math anyhow?" WRONG! Well, no matter how you look at it, math IS boring. And, I will not be required to take any math classes in my master's program. Already checked that out. However, I felt so stupid and inefficient as I guessed my way through the quantitative sections of the test. I berated myself over not being sure of answers to even the simplest percentage and word problems. The result was a personal sense of failure. I know I could have done better.
In the end, I achieved an average score: slightly above average in verbal, slightly below average in math. Not suprising but disappointing all the same. Especially knowing that I knew about this test well in advance and had all the materials, and time, I needed to properly prepare and perhaps increase my scores significantly from where they ended up.
One positive note: I do feel I excelled in the two writing sections. My SAT teaching helped me to apply myself in a strong way. However, those scores are about 2 weeks away.
The result of this learning experience is that I need to take the GRE one more time. I think I could still get into the program I want with the score I received, but for my own self-esteem, I want to do it the right way and hope to drastically improve my score.
The good thing about this painful lesson is that next time I teach my SAT course, I will know from experience the excuses my students give me....and I will be able to respond from a perspective of understanding.
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