Father

That word...FATHER...is such a powerful word.

A word, like many words, that will have varied degrees of meaning to every person. Every person will view the concept of "father" through his or her own filter, whether based on faith, experience, expectation, illusion. Most likely a potpourri of all of these.

The literal meaning of the word "father" is easy: a man who raises a child. The child does not necessarily have to be his biological child. He is the one who raises that child, guides him through life. Each of us has a father, whether biological or not, who helped raise us (for good or for bad) from children to adults.

The connotative meaning of "father" can be drawn from that. Some descriptions that I came up with, based on my experiences with and memories of my own father and the fathers of my friends: strength, wisdom, and leadership. For some, the term "father" might usher descriptions such as forgiveness, compassion, and kindness.

History uses the term to refer to a creator of new ways of thought or process. Herodotus is considered the "father" of history and Galileo is considered the "father" of modern science.

The biblical meaning of the word "father" is "good". The church refers to God as "Father".

I think we all get the idea. It seems like an almost impossible task to be a father. No wonder so many men struggle with it.

Most succeed at it, in the end, even when they think they failed. Their children are testament to that as they declare that their father is the best in the world.

Some don't succeed quite as well. Yet, their children will still find a way(s) to uphold and uplift them.

And, following in the connotative sense of the word, there are men out there who are not fathers in the literal sense of the word (e.g. did not create the life), but who represent fathers in a connotative sense. They are, for many, role models and heroes. In a sense, surrogate fathers. They are no less of a "good" influence than biological fathers. They provide a sense of strength, wisdom, and direction to those who are seeking it.

This is their day as well.

I end with a poem that I found at Ellen Bailey Poems. It is a tribute to ALL fathers: biological, adopted, surrogate, role models.

A Father Like You

Father poems

I just want you to know you mean the world to me Only a heart as dear as yours would give so unselfishly. The many things you've done, all the times that you were there, Helps me know deep down inside how much you really care. Even though I might not say it, I appreciate all you do So richly blessed is how I feel for having a father just like you.

Hope

Romans 8:24-25 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

I have a few loved ones who are struggling. Really struggling...with life. Their struggles run the gamut. Struggles of the heart, the mind, the wallet....all at the same time.

We all have to live our lives. And all of our lives at some point include struggles.

We cannot escape this reality. So we keep plodding on.

But we each have different ways of approaching life's struggles. I believe that how we approach them has a direct relation to their resolution.

Many factors go into any person's approach to their struggles.

• Perspective
• Experience
• Resources, both perceived and real
• Personal demeanor
• Emotional stability
• Problem solving ability
• Support system, family and friends
• Focus
• Determination
• Perseverance

But, the biggest factor of all is HOPE.

Anyone who experiences strife or struggle ~ and, let's face it, that's all of us ~ will fair better with a strong dose of hope. And, like medicine, repeat the dosage until the struggle is over.

Hope alone will not resolve the struggle. It might not even make it easier or quicker. But it can be the force, sometimes the only force, that gets one to the desired result when the struggle gets too painful and unrelenting.

So, back to my loved ones who are struggling...it occurred to me that in situations where their struggle is intense enough where there is nothing tangible I can give them or do for them, that the only thing left is to be part of their support system. What else do I have to offer?

The words don't help anymore...and it has come down to just listening.

What is left? The only thing left is hope.

I proceeded to try to analyze this logically by asking one simple question: How can one offer hope to someone who has lost all hope?

In my research, I encountered a few blogs that were marginally helpful. But, then I ran across a great website that said it all. Check out 10 Ways to Give People Hope! Simple and intuitive.

• Acceptance
• Love
• Appreciation
• Approval
• Connection
• Comfort
• Encouragement
• Respect
• Protection
• Support

Even though the concept of hope is an intangible...and more so for those who have lost or misplaced it, Don Follis succeeds in quantifying it. He has tied it to actions that we can take to help our loved ones.

Thanks to Don's ideas, I have a renewed approach to offering hope to my loved ones who are mired in their struggles at this time.

We are all interconnected in this life. God has placed us in each other's lives for a reason. Those reasons most times are a mystery to us. If the reasons are unclear, it is difficult to understand or be clear on what to do.

Stop trying to understand and just do what Jesus would do...offer love, hope, and a little bit of your own humanity to your brother, your friend.

Prayer Pool

I have posted many times before about prayer, from several different angles.

Have you ever thought about who you pray to? I never did, until this past Sunday when the deacon brought it up in his homily.

He started with the usual prelude about praising God, praising Jesus. Getting away from asking for things and simply giving thanks and praise for what you do have and where you are now.

That sort of thing. Yawn...heard it before.

But then he went in a direction that I had never really thought of before and definitely never heard before. I don't remember the details of what he said, which means you as the reader will be extremely lucky because this post is apt to be short because of my lack of memory.

He brought in the concept of prayer to Mary, to Jesus, to the Holy Spirit, and to God. Not just God. Interesting. I mean, I pray the rosary (being Catholic and all kind of does that to me). But my prayer to Mary consists of a litany of Hail Marys. Nothing more, nothing less...because I figure God is getting the brunt of it.

The deacon introduced the concept of what I comprehend as tiered prayer (maybe I just coined a new phrase???). You pray to the Holy Spirit in order to gain the peace in your day, peace about the things with which you struggle on a daily basis. Things that have become uncontrollable enough to destroy your inner balance.

You pray to Mary for comfort and understanding. Similar to how a child would approach a mother when that child is sad or hurt. If Mary can't resolve it, you and Mary take your issue to Jesus.

You pray to Jesus for guidance in how to follow God's plan. If the 3 of you cannot resolve it at that point, you all proceed to God.

In this sense, prayer can be congregate. In other words, take your concerns to Jesus, to Mary, and if your prayers are not satisfied, together all of you can proceed to the Father for his rendering.

Because, in the end, He is really the only one who knows the grand plan.

My rendering of his homily is very simplistic. And, for non-Catholics, probably somewhat controversial. Hey, at least he didn't throw all of our saints into the prayer pool as well.

In the end, it is just another perspective on prayer. Just something I felt strongly about sharing.